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I knew he was right—I just didn't know what it meant. Doug was tall with dark hair and eyes, but it wasn't his looks that unglued me.
A recent business school graduate, he was smart, confident, and witty. We dated for a few months and had intense—if, in retrospect, vanilla—sex.
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Months went by after we'd broken up, but I couldn't get Doug out of my head. I was initially shocked, and yet it made perfect sense. I messaged him: "I didn't know you had this side of you.
I began having fantasies about him like I'd never had about anyone. I'd heard about BDSM—bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism—but didn't know much about it. Wasn't it weird that I, a proud feminist, could enjoy something so degrading? Wink, wink."At first, we casually texted, catching up on each other's lives.